Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Love Is A Tree

Love is a tree, when it moves us like this, how can our souls' limbs not touch? 

        “Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don't blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being "in love", which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.” ― Louis de Bernières, Captain Corelli's Mandolin

    That's the thing about pretty things - like trees with colorful flowers or trees with strong branches - they captivate us and enchant us. We're excited, on fire, energized, infatuated, and don't get me wrong, these are all worthy emotions that have their place in a love story. But those things will probably fade (though the idealist in me thinks otherwise)...maybe because you don't hang out with the cool crowd anymore (hello 8th grade) or because you need time to discover yourself (high school) or because life took you in a different direction (college). Or maybe you'll survive all of that and then the toilet will break and you just swear to yourself not only could you not fix a toilet with this person, but also you know you could never fix life's problems with them. Or know.
     Conversely, there is another alternative to this love story. It could last forever, when all the pretty things, all the news things, all the putting-forth-your-best self things fade away, you really do find out that you like their roots, you like them stripped bare, you like them when they have nothing to offer but the awakenings of their own soul and the desire to share those with you. You find that you still feel magical just sitting by their side. Your souls' limbs are touching, and that's enough. In fact, that's more than enough.

    The video below is a beautiful dialogue about love - when it arrives, when it ends, when it begins again, suddenly, expectedly, familiarly. It's a video worth watching!

"When Love Arrives" (2012), Sarah Kay and Phil Kaye

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